A Thankful Heart....

I have felt strongly that at this time I need to share my thoughts and feeling with those of you who are closest to me and who love me for me.

This time of year is a hard & overwhelming with the darkness that seems to cloud my mind from past mistakes I had made during this season.  

This year, as these negative thoughts and influences started to enter, I prayed for help and have felt mercy from the Lord fill my heart with the wonderful things I have in my life, and the good I have done and do. Reminding me of the people who matter and who love me in spite of my mistakes. He has shown me great kindness and love.

As I have been reading and preparing for the New Curriculum in Young Womens, and reading about each member of the Godhead I have felt their individual roles in my life. And the testimony I have for each.
 As I think of the Holy Ghost I know he fills us....fingertip to foot. Because of the choices I made I lost my membership in the church, for a time. Before that time I always thought of the Holy Ghost as just a feeling in my heart, but since that time I KNOW He is a Spirit that FILLS each of us who is worthy. As my Bishop told me I was no longer able to have the Holy Ghost as my constant companion I literally felt someone step out of my body. As I stood there empty, hollow...I did not know how I was ever going to get back...I was instantly filled with despair. Luckily, I had many people who loved me, prayed for me...counsel me and I did have a testimony....many times in my life I had had seeds of faith planted and I eventually was able to be re baptized. Of course I still have consequences I live with, and I am sure some of those consequences have yet to come. But now that I have the Holy Ghost I know he can lead me to what I need to do in those times, if I am worthy of His influence.

  (When I took this picture I was filled with the Spirit. I am SO thankful for my Father teaching me to appreciation nature and the beauty of this earth. {Scare Canyon, up at Brians dads land})

As I think of my Father in Heaven I am in awe and wonder at his love. I get overwhelmed just thinking of the love He possesses, and the man He is.
When I think of Him I think of the song "I am a child of God"
I am a child of God,
And he has sent me here,
Has given me an earthly home
With parents kind and dear.

 I am a child of God,
And so my needs are great;
Help me to understand his words
Before it grows to late.

 I am a child of God.
Rich blessings are in store;
If I but learn to do his will
I'll live with him once more.

 I am a child of God.
His promises are sure;
Celestial glory shall be mine
If I can but endure.
Lead me, guide me, walk beside me,
Help me find the way.
Teach me all that I must do
To live with him someday.

As I think of how disappointed my own father was in me as I confessed my failing, I could not imagine the pain I had caused my Father in Heaven. But even in the darkest of nights when I felt lost forever...as I got on my knees I felt His love fill me and testify that I am one of His daughters and He forgave me and wanted me to come back. I am grateful to know that He loves me, regardless, and wants me to always come to Him and He can make me whole through His Sons sacrifice.

{"the heavens are open...God hears and answers the prayers of His children." Elder Utchdorf}

(Idaho Falls, my dads land...sunrise)

And as I think of our Savior, Jesus Christ, my heart is full. I think of His life and all He did, all He gave. Who He is and how I have the opportunity to continually repent and become whole through His blood, and sacrifice. How amazing, how beautiful...that this Man chose to come to this earth...endure the trials of this world and overcome the natural man and then sacrifice Himself for each of us to become whole through repentance!  I am so grateful for this knowledge and the chance I have had to use the Atonement so fully in my life. The day I reentered the waters of Baptism was so powerful. The love and mercy I felt from the Lord was all encompassing. As worthy priesthood holders encircled me, my testimony of the REAL "Power in the Priesthood" came to light and I will never be the same. I felt as if I could reach out and hold the feeling that that surrounded. Knowing that I was forgiven of my Father in Heaven, through His Son, and able to have the Holy Ghost in my life again forever changed me.  Of course I still fall short, I still give in to my natural man and have days and weeks sometimes of giving into Satan. But as I realized the path I'm on and ask for forgiveness and strength to be more and to do better I again feel the Lords love and assurance that I can do it...WITH HIM! :O) I have a testimony of the 3. I know they are separate and each have a role in our lives. I am thankful for each of their influences in my life and for the opportunity I have to learn more about each.

 I love He lives...and I am Thankful for that knowlegde!

I am so Thankful to me a Mother. To have these 6 kids in my life. I feel blessed to have such a full crazy home.  To continue to learn and grow from each child and their needs.

I am SO blessed!!!!

Happy Halloween

Our SuPEr 8!

Pumpkin Patch & Hiking

 Oct 1st started with picking Pumpkins in an awesome Pumpkin Patch! 

I love to support this one because all the proceeds they put in a bank account for their boys LDS mission funds!

 Love doing anything with the Wards! (Happy Birthday Ridgey)

 General Conference Weekend we went up Douglas Trail Head and

Our big Puppy El

 Derby our Handsome Stud!

Bethy was done by the end of the hike!

The Month of September

 September was busy...soccer, soft ball, karate, tumbling...getting back into the routine of school!

Brigham City Temple Walk Through. I hope this is where we will be sealed to Beth. :O)

Brian headed a SoftBall League.

I love this picture...he's so intense and look at his calf....Daaanng!

 Brigham City Temple Dedication..with the Ward Family!

 Ben started Karate and LOVES IT!  

He has done so well and it's good to see him in something he enjoys.

Joey and Lily are in Tumbling and trying to master their cartwheels....

School started we are excited about their teachers, and the prospects this school year.

AUGUST was a BLAST!

Brian & I had so much fun taking Beth to the zoo. She is so smart. Every time she speaks I am in awe at how amazing she is! I am so lucky to have her and to have a Father for her like Brian!

 

Hiking with the kids! Aren't they so funny!?

Sydnee got Baptized!  It was a special day, and beautiful to see her dad Baptize her. I am so glad she waited for him and held out through all the up's and down's of figuring it all out!

It was a Beautiful and Special Day!

Me and my kids slept out in the TREE HOUSE!!! to make it official! It was fun!!!

My kids and I went and stayed with Becca the week before school started. 

Ate yummy food

Went to Bear Lake

Played at the Park and just enjoyed one on one with Cousins.

This picture could sum up our Summer! 

Our summer time went WAY too fast, but we got ALOT of time with all the kids together.

~Mondays Free Lunch

~sleep overs. 

~We built our Tree House

~Friends

~Late Movie Nights

Summer 2012 ROCKED!

July 2012 (Part 2)

Papa Gailen married Susan..."G Ma"

She is such a wonderful addition to our family.

You can NEVER have too many awesome grandmas! :O)

RECOONION 2012! The Terrills were in charge and it was a BLAST!

It was AWESOME, the kids got to swim and play in the mud all day long. 

(Dylan/Finley/Mollie)

Brian cutting the watermelon, my favorite daddy eating it :O)

some...SISTERS  (Katie/Becca/Sharla/Kailey)

My chubby baby Bethy. being around aunts she gets WHATEVER she wants...so she NEVER stopped eating!

Willow just learned to walk and was loving the freedom and space she had to run around.

SQUARE Ice Cream Cones. This Recoonion had so many memories from my childhood. It was SO fun to share these places with my kids!

We decided to go straight to a hotel from camping, for the last night in Idaho. It was so much fun to swim, walk around the Idaho Falls Temple and go out to eat. 

I feel so blessed to have the Family I have. I have the best brothers and sisters and I am SO grateful for the love and friendship I share with each of them.

Summer keeps going (July Part 1)

 July kicked off with a FUN TRIP!!!  Brian had a seminar so we decided to take the whole week and enjoy a LONG LONG LONG...(did I mention Long?) drive together. We decided to go 4 hours out of our way also to see the Grand Canyon. It was BEAUTIFUL, words cant express the WOWNESS you get from seeing one of the Worlds Wonders.

I loved these weird trees all over at the Grand Canyon. The Highlights of this trip were the Miranda Lambert/Darius Rucker Concert, a professional baseball game, sitting by pool every day, reading, EATING LOTS and  G&Amy flew out to spend the week with us!

 When Brian and I got back from the Arizona (me and mine) went to Idaho for a weekend together. We went to our Childhood Lake, Rigby Lake. It was so much fun to swim and laugh and play with my sisters, cousins, and make some memories.

(Dylan, Chandler,Beth, Joey, & Lily)

Cuties (Tebbin and Dylan )

Finnerz

Chloe

 Our Baby Beth turned 2! She LOVED this picture and was excited that she "put her hand right there" She is such a perfect addition and completion to our family.  I am so glad she is part of my life. I have been able to slow down as a mom and really savor this last season of baby life.

The Month of June

Our Month started out with Lily's 6th Birthday! This year for Birthdays we let the kids invite a couple friends over and made a movie theater in the Basement for them.  The kids loved it and enjoyed to giggles and extra presents they got.

Grandma Joy invited us to David Condo to go swimming. We played for hours and had SO much fun! (sad Syd and Haylee had other plans with their mom)

Brian had a Triathlon at the Summer Games in St. George so we stayed with Josh and Julie and then Bonnie and Beau with Syd and Haylee. The girls had so much fun at this bounce house and with their cousins. (Kat, Eric, Jackson, and Ammon)

Brian coming in on his bike (second leg of the Tri) I love watching and supporting him! I am proud of him and always excited when he signs up for a race.

Joey got a Easy Bake Oven for her 8th Birthday. So grateful for Brian and for the role he lays in my kids lives. Even though he isn't there dad...he support them, loves them, teaches them, and provides me the opportunity to stay home and be there mom...I am so lucky!

My sister Hanna came to stay with us for a week and we got to go to the Zoo and see the Polar Bear and new Artic Center....AWESOME! It was so much fun to have her in town and I got SO much done in my house because of her. It was a blessing to have a sister come and stay for A WHOLE WEEK, just for me, I needed it more than she will ever know at that time in my life!

Joey Got Baptized! A special and emotional day. I am grateful for her choice to join The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.  I hope she will always remember this day, and the feeling shared through the Spirit!

Lily's T-ball Team got picked to go out on the field with the Ogden Raptors for the National Anthem. It was a fun game even though we had to leave early due to her getting sick. :O(

June was a busy and full month...but a memorable one! It went too fast!!!