Saturday, March 29, 2014

Lucky Us...

“At the creation of man and woman, unity for them in marriage was not given as hope; it was a command! ‘Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh’ (Genesis 2:24). Our Heavenly Father wants our hearts to be knit together. That union in love is not simply an ideal. It is a necessity” (in Conference Report, Apr. 1998, 85; or Ensign, May 1998, 66

I know we have been divorced & that we haven't been perfect examples but I hope you know that dad and I have learned from our mistakes and what we failed to do in our first marriages and we are trying to set a better example of what you should do in your marriages to keep them strong and healthy.

Here are some things that have helped us... 
~Weekly date night- you don't have to spend any money to go out together- 
~We go to the temple @ least monthly 
~take a trip together alone every year.

I hope you marry someone who spoils you. Who makes you feel like you are important & special. But I also hope you make them feel the same. You have to invest TIME and energy in your marriage to make it work. 
I am so grateful to be married to Brian. For the sacrifice and stress he takes on to support 2 households. He sets a great example for each of you. We are all lucky to have such a great example in our lives.
 I Love This Man!!!! :O)

So excited to add another sweet spirit to our family!

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Learning through kindness...

Since the beginning of December I have made a constant effort to except my husbands challenge to Be Kind NO MATTER WHAT.  I have struggled with my feeling towards certain people in our lives and what I believe to be their real intent. And as I have let go of responding and communicating with this person, and just been kind when I have had to- I have come to find more peace in my life, because I'm not always trying to figure out "what is meant" and "how it was intended."  

I have found myself more concerned with who I am and who the Lord really needs me to be.
Before December I was suffering with depression, severe anxiety which caused rapid heart rate, to the point of loosing my breath, & acid reflex in my throat daily for hours.  Since I excepted my sweet Husbands challenge I only rarely have these symptoms, and it is usually from my failing and having unkind thoughts.

For 4 years I thought my way was the right way...."responding is the kind thing," "being helpful is kind." Brian finally said to me "Sometimes the kind thing is to leave it all alone, and not respond."  He was SO right...I only wish I would have listen 4 years ago.  He is such a good example of just not responding when he's being pushed & bullied...of course he has failed, but 
I am SO grateful I have FINALLY decided to make this change in my life. "I really am THE ONLY ONE who can change me, and I can't change anyone else...ONLY ME!"

I am in awe every time I apply the Lord teachings- how His promises are He asks us to give Him our burden, and how light then the burden becomes. I have also realize I "vent/complain" less to those around me about my problems because I seem to have less problems.

In Ephesians 4:31-32 it says "Let all bitterness, and wrath, ad anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you...and be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving on another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you."

The MOST beautiful & glorious news of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, is the opportunity that we have to be whole because the Savior suffered all pains, afflictions, & sickness that He might know exactly how to heal us.  I have experience the FULL and beautiful sweet forgiveness, and I am grateful to continue daily to seek His sweet peace and tender mercy in my weakness.

This past week I have been studying "Contention" & I realized being kind is the best way to rid my life of contention and the feelings, anger & confusion it brings into my life.  3 Nephi 11:29 says "...he that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another."

I do not want something that invites the devil and his influences into my life...or into my marriage. It was a spirit I was allowing in my home daily through my anger and hate. Even if I thought I was hiding it well, I know I wasn't. 

I don't know if any of you struggle with unkind thoughts or saying things that are hurtful, or speaking ill of someone. But I am sharing this post to testify the Lords promises are sure!  He will help and lift and strengthen, but we have to ask, seek, and repent. I am so grateful for a gaining a testimony of something that I am sure is easy for most....KINDNESS!